started with a goodbye, (r)

[KITAOJI HIROKI]

[atrb=valign, top] he hadn't expected to find part of his past at the academy. he had only recently joined the academy after several months of his father arguing with his mother as to whether or not he would go to america or school in japan. but that was more or less irrelevant to the point. he hadn't expected to run into someone that had up and disappeared from his life almost entirely. and it was, perhaps for only that, that hiroki was heading in the direction of the host club. or at least, he was making the attempt to anyway. ugh. he scratched his cheek, his only available eye examining the sheet of paper that one of the girls had been kind enough to draw on. it was supposed to be a map of sorts to help him around the school. but with all the cutesy characters drawn all over the pathways, it more or less made it impossible to make sense of where he was going. ugh. whatever. he couldn't have asked one of the guys to tell him either. the host club- supposedly -was for women. and well. guys didn't venture there. ever. usually anyway. ugh. he couldn't make sense of this dang thing. he turned the paper slightly, nearly walking into a wall as he did. it had been how many years since he had last seen him? three? five? he didn't think that he would have been okay after everything had happened. did he manage to get away? or had that man taken him away? he frowned, a look of annoyance settling onto his face though it was apparent to everyone that it hardly belonged there. upon arriving at a large set of doors, he merely glanced at the name plate. the third music room, hm? he couldn't understand why they used a music room. not like any of them ... well. played music. well. as far as he knew anyway. and that wasn't saying very much. hiroki rested his hand on the gilded handle, unsure. what if it was an entirely different kira that was here? or worse yet, what if he didn't even remember him? agh, it was killing him inside! all the what ifs that he probably could never come up with an answer too. he paced back and forth in front of the doors, moving only slightly for the girls to walk past him every so often. yes? no? yes? ...no? what if he did remember hiro but he was so embarrassed that he pretended that he didn't? what if he didn't want him around? what if? he flung himself to the marble support beams, tears brimming at his eye as he struggled to conclude just exactly what he intended to do. nope, that was it! he wasn't ready for this. maybe he could go home and emotionally prepare himself. maybe make muffins or something to apologize for taking his time! no, no, no. there was a chance that kira could very well up and leave again. oh, but. he wasn't emotionally ready! he felt like crying and like a mess and he just couldn't. who was he. what was his own name even? lord, he forgot his name. he rolled across the ground, earning strange looks from various others before the redhead finally steeled his nerves. maybe his bout of insanity was right. what if kira left again? what was he going to do when that happened? a chance to talk to him again and make sure that he was okay may not have come again. he drew in a deep breath. whatever happened would happen no matter how much time he stalled for. he got up from the floor, dusting himself off (not that there was dust, the floors were probably clean enough to eat off of) before approaching the doors again. he glanced around the room, emerald peering around for any signs of a familiar face if any. how strange, he thought. was he just not here? or had he really changed so much that he didn't see him? hiroki turned slightly, approaching a rather official looking young man with a clipboard in hand. he tapped him on the shoulder, the indigo haired man turning just slightly before giving an overly exuberant smile. he giggled. "hello!" the boy chirped, hiroki more than confused by the outcome of the situation. he could practically see the glimmering lights and flowery background behind him. "i ... um. i need to talk to kira if that's alright with you!" he stammered out finally, nearly biting his tongue as he struggled to pronounce the damned words. the blue haired boy merely giggled again, nearly throwing his clipboard in the air before he began to walk over in the direction of the requested person. "kiki-hime, you have a visitor!" he sang, leaving the redhead more than bewildered. was he four or what? because he saw him in a few of the classes near by his own. but then again. this school was pretty strange in itself, he thought. hiro glanced in the direction of the boy who seemed to be more than jabbering away with the girls present. he glanced at the white haired of the two, pausing for a minute. "kira?" words: 873! tags: zeit's prince kira! notes: pardon the bad intro. credit: template made by oxymoron! of btn

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[hibiki kira]

painted on smiles and forced laughter haunted the young host as he attempted to distract himself by forcing conversation with his clients; however, fate opposed him due to the low number of clients. on any other day, he would have welcomed the moments of relaxation between each customer. an earlier client informed him of a schedule conflict that caused most of his regular costumers to miss the host club activities, and in response to this information, he smiled and offered words of gratitude and his joy at their dedication to their other interests. her soft giggling and faint blush displayed her infatuation with the white haired youth and awe at his easy acceptance of his regular clients’ absence. generally, he and tsuruya kiyoshi, the club president, attempted to schedule the host club activities around school events, but they could not avoid a schedule conflict due to the numerous amounts of clubs and teams that ouran sponsored. kira had to accept that fact and continue on with his life. the world did not bend to his will and his wants. his informant departed soon after which left petite teen to his own thoughts.

the sound of a chair being pulled back dragged kira away from his morbid thoughts, and he forced a smile and bid his new companion a polite hello. he listened attentively to her story and offered advice and comfort when needed. she departed with a brilliant smile and high spirits; however, kira leaned back into his seat and heaved a soundless sigh. his charade continued with each new client that claimed the seat across from him. when his current client, murahashi reiko, sat down, he struggled to maintain his facade, for he wanted someone to see past his mask and force everyone else to leave him alone. his smile faltered as the girl began to whine about her family and the lack of privacy. he wanted to scream at her and tell her to treasure each moment spent with her parents and siblings; his own family consisted only of an uncle that hated every fiber of his being. nonetheless, she continued chattering away with only brief pauses to munch on a cookie or to take a sip of her tea.

kiyoshi’s voice interrupted reiko’s story about her younger twin brothers, and kira fought against the urge to thank the other male for saving him from the agony of listening to reiko’s continued complaints. the girl huffed in annoyance and began mumbling to herself. silvery blue tinted eyes landed on the eye patch wearing male who apparently wanted to speak to him. his gaze traveled over the red head until his eyes locked with one emerald colored eye, and kira found himself incapable of producing a sound. why was he here? he swallowed and merely nodded once to reiko’s harsh goodbye. the young musician found himself unable to focus on anyone else. memories bombarded his whirling mind, and it dawned on him that his new companion knew nothing about the past two years. did he even know that kira survived? the petite teen shivered at the reminder of his near death. h-hiro, he breathed out in a near whisper.

when… how… why…, he murmured, feeling dazed and overwhelmed. quivering hands motioned for the red head to take the recently vacated seat while he attempted to gain even partial control over his own emotions. two years of no contact left kira wondering if hiroki even wanted to rekindle their friendship, and he wanted to know if anyone ever mentioned that he survived the coma though he could not remember how he ended up in that state. etto…, sky blue hued eyes dropped to stare at the table while white teeth bit down on his bottom lip. his hands rested in his lap and fiddled with the hem of baby blue jacket. kira remembered each excoriating detail of his departure from the village he and hiroki spent their childhood in, and he wanted to tell the red head all about his uncle’s sudden desire to move far, far away from the place that kira learned to call home. their move had nothing to do with kira’s own desires, and everything to do with his uncle’s gambling debt.

worried grey colored eyes glanced at hiroki through his lashes and bangs. he ceased nibbling on his bottom lip and tried to find words suitable to explain himself to the red head, and kira knew he needed to say something, anything. h-hi. the white haired host winced at his choice of greeting. maybe he could forget about everything that happened between his departure and now. hiroki deserved to know the truth, not lies of his own creation. kira shuddered at the memory of his uncle’s furious eyes that bored into his own as he finally stirred from his three month long coma, and he remembered his confusion at ryusuke’s command of hurry up and pack up. we leave in thirty minutes after they reached the decrepit shack on the outskirts of the village. i-it’s n-nice to s-see you a-again, hiro, he added with a hesitant smile appearing on his pale mien. hopefully, hiroki would forgive him and not press for information until they were alone.

[KITAOJI HIROKI]

[atrb=valign, top] he couldn't believe it. hell, part of him didn't want to believe it either. maybe he had really just fallen and hit his head or some unfortunate incident. maybe he had really fallen down the stairs and his entire life had been a mere fantasy. who was to say, he thought. well. perhaps that was a bit too far fetched for him to have even begun to realize. maybe it was insanity rather than it was reality. perhaps he had missed him to the point that his mind had created this as a figment of his imagination. yet, part of him knew this was real. he knew he wasn't dreaming or insane or anything of the sort. he had never thought that he was going to come and run into kira again. he hadn't even known that he had made it out alive. his hand lifted to graze the fabric of his eye patch gingerly. he knew that he had, though not without injury himself. he hadn't been able to see out of that eye in years now. was kira okay now? did he ever leave that man? did he ever report him? doubtful. hiroki had yelled at him every time that he would come over bloody and battered. yet nothing changed. nothing could change. had it now though? he trembled in his place, wondering if he should have moved. if he could even breathe. if he had felt anxiety before, he felt it now more than ever in his life. "kira," every syllable of his name was pronounced as if with a purpose. even just his name felt important to him now. he moved a bit dumbly, having forgotten to even breathe for a moment. wait. how did he even walk or ... or how ... ugh, he couldn't even think. he looked at him, trying to think of what to do. what to say. now that he had come, now that he had a chance to talk to him. every thought and word he thought he was going to say had escaped him. "i... you..." he felt like crying. the words were being just barely choked out as he approached the table a bit timidly. he didn't ... he moved to stand at the table, merely looking down to the pale haired of the two. he hadn't talked to him in years. he hadn't been able to though. he didn't know where kira had gone off to with that bastard of a man. and he wasn't sure that he wanted to know either. the other seemed to have as much trouble trying to process the situation as he was. small droplets of water landed on the smooth surface of the polished table. h- huh? what...? hiroki lifted his hands to his face, fingers brushing gently at the wet trails left behind by the tears. he hadn't even realized he was crying. he just. he was so happy and. and he didn't... hiroki failed to even sit down, the redhead moving quickly to wrap the other up in his arms. how could he just get up and disappear like that? he had come to visit every day and the one day that he couldn't was the one day that he had stopped being able to see him. soft sobs escaped him, his form trembling as he stood there with his back facing the women and other hosts that filled the club room. some whispered to one another, perplexed by the situation. he was just so happy...! he thought that for sure he must have been... or ... or worse yet... he could have been... his grip only tightened, hiro biting his lip in fear of crying even loud enough for everyone to hear. he didn't want to cry. he just looked stupid when he did but. he could barely hear kira's words above the sound of his own breaths and the thumping of his heart. "kira, you asshole. where have you been?

[/color]" his words were broken apart by the occasional sniffle and lapse in breath in a low whisper. the nurses failed to tell him much of anything. the only thing he did know was that kira was gone and chances were, he wasn't going to meet him again. and now that he was. now that he was, he didn't want to let him go again in fear.

"i missed you. i'm so happy i get to see you again." he didn't want to let go and find out he was gone again. he didn't want to lose his dearest friend again. to a dream, to that man, to anyone. he wasn't sure if he could stand it. it had been hard enough letting go of him the first time, he thought.

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words: 791!
tags: zeit's prince kira!
notes: boop boop.
credit: template made by oxymoron! of btn

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[hibiki kira]

what was he supposed to say? to do? white teeth continued to press against his bottom lip as his gaze roved over his childhood friend’s figure. over the past two years, kira often found himself wondering about how hiroki was faring and if the red head missed him. the first few months after the move had been excruciatingly hard to live through, for the white haired musician only wanted to race back to the red head’s side and never leave again. his uncle refused, locked him in his room for hours on end to try and dissuade kira from attempting to escape. in the end, kira bowed down to his uncle’s demands and tried to keep himself from spending all day worrying about hiroki; however, during the darkest hours of the night, his thoughts returned to the red head without fail. kira vividly recalled the nights spent curled up in his bed, burrowed under the covers, whispering soft apologies to the red head while tears poured from his eyes. nightmares plagued him for week with hiroki accusing him of abandoning the red head, and the white haired violinist would wake, sobbing and afraid that the hate in the red head’s eyes might be true.

silvery blue hued eyes blinked open and closed rapidly as the red head moved closer to where he sat, and kira’s fingers tugged relentlessly at the hem of his baby blue jacket. his eyes searched hiroki’s features for some insight into his childhood friend’s emotions. the cyclone of feelings pounded through kira’s body left him struggling to keep his apprehension, surprise, and fear from showing on his pallid mien. he wanted to believe that the red head did not hate him for disappearing; however, his nightmares flashed through his mind’s eye as he waited for hiroki to do or say anything aside from his name. his own ability to string together words seemed to have vanished due to the red head’s unannounced, unexpected presence in the third music room, in ouran academy, and in tokyo.

kira’s body froze as the tears began to fall from hiroki’s emerald colored eye, and the white haired youth found himself unable to understand the meaning behind the red head’s tears. was hiroki overjoyed to see him? or so angry that he could not stop his anger from displaying itself in the form of tears? the young host wanted to believe the former rather than the latter; however, he was not hiroki. he knew absolutely nothing about how the red head’s life had gone for the past two years. he had no idea whether hiroki even wanted to see him again after this. had he purposely sought kira out? the petite teen thought that would have to be the case since males tended to prefer spending their afternoon’s being catered to by the hostess club, so hiroki could not have possibly had another reason for seeking out the host club. at least, kira wanted to believe that hiroki came because he had been seeking the teenaged musician out.

as familiar arms wrapped around kira’s tense body, the white haired host found himself automatically relaxing, and for the first time since seeing hiroki, kira’s worries began to ebb away. the red head’s question sent the young host’s thoughts racing as he tried to think of a suitable answer. he refused to lie to hiroki about anything except matters concerning his own health; however, he did not have the slightest idea toward how to find a suitable response for his sudden departure and continued absence for the past two years. on the day of his disappearance, kira promised himself that he would return after graduation and see hiroki for one last time, for he had convinced himself that the red head would never forgive him. tears slid down his cheeks as he rested his forehead against his companion’s shoulder. his arms shifted to wrap around the red head’s body while his fingers clutched at the fabric of hiroki’s jacket. petal pink lips twisted into the smallest of smiles at the red head’s next statement, and he relished the feeling of his friend’s arms tightening around kira’s slightly shaking form.

i’m sorry, he finally managed to say in a near whisper. in the back of his mind, he realized that they were making quite the scene while the hosts continued to try and entertain their clients, but kira lacked the ability to find it within himself to care. by the end of the day, ouran would have a slew of new rumors spreading across campus regarding him and hiroki. for the first time, the white haired violinist did not care what they decided to speculate on due to the impromptu show the clients were receiving from the pair. i missed you too, he admitted with his words sounding stronger and louder to his own ears. i… i’ve been here. my uncle wanted to escape his gambling debt, so he made us move. i’m sorry for not telling you. i wanted to. white teeth applied pressure to his bottom lip again as he added in a barely audible tone, please don’t hate me.